this is not a fucking love poem

when i catch feelings you can find me doing a variety of things like wishing i was smoking a cigarette or smoking a cigarette & blowing the smoke all over my own face in the mirror because it’s not even my face because it’s the face of everyone i’ve ever met been before & everyone i’ve met up until now or have yet to meet, don’t you know we’re all connected & you’d be hard pressed for luck if you didn’t abide by the feelings book that your body has written, it’s centuries old & the reason you don’t remember it is because you’re too busy doing things that give you non-feelings, so i smoke thousands of cigarettes for you & me, you can also find me in corpse pose.

when i catch feelings i might pull away & build myself a turtle shell and hermit crab the fuck outta my life because i’m afraid that what i feel isn’t mine but from an entity i can’t identify & if you’re not scared of the thought of feelings from other planets and plants and ancestors, you might not have ever caught a real feeling so you’d better check your body over trice.

 when i catch feelings we might be vibing on the same thing which is cool and means we get each other or at least one of us gets the other which means we’re reflecting and not retracting like some other species might do although our species surely does that & i’m guilty of it , too, but when i see you look at me like that with those eyes & i just know, you know, we know that this is temporary & we have so many lives to live yet & i see all your rainbows & stars & oceans & trees & skies, i hope that you can see mine.  

 

 

jacklyn janeksela is a wolf and a raven, a cluster of stars, &  a direct descent of the divine feminine.  she can be found @ Thought CatalogLuna MagazineTalking BookDumDum MagazineVisceral BrooklynAnti-Heroin ChicPublic PoolReality Hands,  The Feminist WireWord For/WordPankSplit LipCivil Coping Mechanism anthology A Shadow Map & Outpost Rooted anthology; & elsewhere.   she is in a post-punk band called the velblouds. her baby @ femalefilet.  she is an energy.  find her at  https://www.hermetichare.com/ for herbal astrological readings.